Hmm….

OH yes, i’m writing in my blog. I fear that i’ve been becoming somewhat closer to my enjoyment of writing than before. I mean, writing is all well and good, but a blog? I havn’t thought of it in a while.

Essentially, two very long diary entries are describing how I feel. It’s needless to post them here because not only are aspects of them things that I don’t want others to see, but I really don’t think ANYONE is reading this, haha.

And, right now, certain people aren’t talking to me. She’s totally avoiding me, i’m sure of it. And no matter what she says…well the most simple way to put it is “You can’t bullshit a bullshitter”

Which is SO true, so if she sees this she can know that…she can’t bullshit me.

The only reason that I put that in such terms is because I miss her, and that fact that she won’t talk to me kinda hurts me.

Ive been thinking about them a TON lately. Mostly about all of the times that we had when we were all insanely close, Me and Michele and Kev and James. Well, Michele and Kev were really close, and me and James tagged along. But the fun things we did- Played starwars, made TONS of “movies”[and one in paticular included bringing leaves in to the house, haha.. that was my favorite]. It was with them that Who Da Trust was originated, hell I’ve even been thinking about that stupid little fountain in their house and how you would hit the table to make it work. Haha I used to love sitting at their counter and playing with it and getting bored really quickly…

I’ve been thinking about the boat game from their swingset, the time me and michele walked down to a little stream, playing starwars, hiking through the woods to the well. I’ve been thinking about when Michele tried to teach me piano, or the time that we made up this whole dance thing [michele did piano, me and james 'danced', kev sang-i think"

Or when she explained to me how her American Doll's hair was growing....that was weird, haha.

Or the time when I slept over after the baby shower, and briana was bothering us SO much.

Or the time when we played "Challenge" in the pool [the first time...]

Or the time when we played starwars…again.

Or the time when we decided whos “worlds” were whos.

Or the time we played Secrets of Droon because Kev and Michele wanted me and James to go away- haha me and James spent all day afraid that those little red monsters would appear…[what were they called?]

Or the time that I threw a fit, and Michele felt bad so she gave me the Scorch beanie-baby. [I still have that somewhere...]

Or the time that we sat in her computer chair, going back and forth between pages on COTH, logging out and logging in as ourselves, trying to get as much posted as humanly possible.

Or the time we all spent all day playing DDR. [james failed at that game...]

Or when we would spend all day organizing a competition, but only getting a few minutes to play them because we spent the whole time setting them up.

Or when we built forts in the living room. I don’t remember that time specifically, but I know we’ve done that too, haha.

Or when James was so excited to tell me that they were having a party in his basement for the new year.

Or when we were making posters in their special room in the basement, and Maggie and Briana were stamping the floor.

Or when we first met her first boyfriend, Andrew, and decided that his ears were WAY bigger than Kevs [haha...]

Or when James was supposed to move up in swimming lessons, and he didn’t because he wanted to stay with me.

Or when we spent a whole day of “Free swim” stacking up those float board thingys, building up until I could get the bravery to jump off the diving board.

And then, she got hooked online. And then, I got hooked online. And then, we were closer than ever, having fun with sidewalk chalk and AIM Rp’s. We would have entire conversations about it, totally connecting as though the characters actually existed. As though they were real people that we saw every day, which they aren’t. They SO Aren’t! They’re fake..things. Hell, according to Kev they wouldn’t even have genders. [Appearntly cartoons don't have genders? I don't know, Kev and Molly are weird, haha...]   .  And then I left, and somehow we don’t talk anymore. And Kev, he moved on, too. Now me and Kev are closer than ever, which I do love. And james, he never had to deal with any of it, that lucky bastard.

I realize that things change, but did they really change so much because of a fucking online world? Somehow that website always ends up more important. Now, shes coding PP and didn’t even take the time to tell me that she was too busy to talk.

Hahaha…I can’t believe i’m ranting about this. After all the time spent with Kev, deciding that PP, and anything related to that website was SO unimportant…I seriously dont know what i’d do without my brother. And I don’t know what i’m GOING to do when he goes to college…[he had BETTER visit, otherwise there won't be enough sarcastic ego-maniacs in the house]

 

And theres so much more. So much stuff unrelated to this…but, my dear imaginary reader, I feel i’ve tortured you enough- that is if you’ve had the attention span to make it this far. And, my thoughts are WAY too tired to even ATTEMPT to figure out how the hell to put all of that in words.

 

So thats it for now <3

 

Condescending?

I was quite recently told that every time I mention how “I havn’t been on PP all day!” it seems condescending. For this, I am sorry, and i’m sorry to anyone else who i’ve said that to, and gets the same feeling. This person went on to add something along the lines of “We can achieve a balance, and it seems like you’re trying to make people quit.”

At the time, I said “I’m sorry, i’ll stop” etc etc. The normal things that I say when I surpress all emotions about a topic in to a tiny corner in my mind. I don’t know what it is about tonight…but I want to have a different reaction.

Maybe I just want to rant, and maybe i’m choosing here because I know no one reads it. Or maybe i’m choosing here because I know that everyone reads it. I’ve got no clue…

The thing is, what was said did really make me angry. Good for you for achieving a balance in life, but the thing is I didn’t. I don’t know why, maybe because i’m a fucking loser, maybe because i’ve been attached to the internet since fourth grade. So please try to understand, and excuse me for being proud of myself.  I’m not trying to be condescending, one thing I hate is when people are condescending. Another thing I hate is hypocrits. Therefore, if I was trying to be condesending, i’d be a hypocrite, and then i’d be forced to hate myself. I’m not up for the whole hating self thing. I’m self conscience enough…

I’m lost without Phoenix Penna. I don’t like to admit it, and I know that i’ve said that i’m much happier without it, but that is a total lie. I said it because i’m to proud to admit that i’m not happier without it. Honestly, it really makes me sad [for lack of a better adjective]. I have no idea what to do with my time anymore, so when I find things to fill it with, I do like to talk about them.

So the last fucking thing I need is to be told that i’m condescending.

Must there be a title?

So, I havn’t updated my blog recently. Thats either because i’ve been to busy, or nothing interesting has happened. I havn’t decided.

I have been really busy, ive been hanging out with my friends a lot. Nothing to write about though, it was really fun, and thats all that has to be said.

I really don’t have much to say tonight.  I quit Phoenix Penna, which makes me happy. Actually, it makes me insanely sad. I’ve lost my dreamworld, but thats all it was.  A fucking dreamworld, and I quit because I didn’t like that idea anymore. I guess I just woke up.

People should face reality rather than hide from it. Embrace the inevitable, because its going to happen anyways, take action rather than complain about it. If you can’t take action, then find a way that you can, and if you know how to take action and are to cowardly to, then just shut the hell up.

I honestly don’t know why these words are coming out of my mind now. Maybe its my over tiredness, or the fact that i’m in a shitty mood. I really don’t care why, and I don’t care that they could be considered harsh. In my opinion, they’re the truth.

I mean, I totally believe that ranting is perfectly acceptable. But dwelling on a situation that isn’t actually a problem? And if it causes a problem, fix it.

To me, drama is a problem. Drama causes problems that shouldn’t exist, wherever it goes. It walks and proudly spreads its anger over happy people. It can be a total bitch like that…

But i’m sick of talking about it. I’m sick of thinking about it, i’m sick of being annoyed with the over dramatic people. They’ll be everywhere, right? Thats inevitable, so embrace that fact.

Whatever, i’m to tired to think properly. This probably doesn’t even make sense…so, night.

 

 

[[[PS. The other day, I ate two muffins. And guess what? I'm still here. So they aren't deadly. They're just bread, in the shape of a fucking cupcake.  Surprising, right?]]]

Random Update on my life :]

So, with it being the 10th, my cousin Alex is leaving today. Actually, sort of tomorrow- its 1:52 AM right now…

She is only going down the road, to Annie and Jennas house, but James is up from Maryland and i’m going to be spending time with him. Me and Alex sat in the living room for a while, playing cards. I love Pig so much! I should teach james how to play….

 

Meanwhile, drama exists within the family. Appearntly someone said something to someone that they weren’t supposed to find out about. Haha I went in to lots of detail there, I know, but thats basically what happened. And now, the whole thing is blown out of porportion, to the point where my poor grandma is feeling guilty, because of a message on her machine, and she shouldn’t be dragged in to this. I wont drag you, poor readers, in to this either. Its just…blahhh.

Now that Alex is leaving, i’m afraid i’m going to be sucked back in to the world that is Phoenix Penna. I mean, I love it. I totally do, and I love everybody soooo much. They’re so kind, and funny, and basically the coolest people I know. But i’ve noticed myself a lot happier now that i’m not in that world, but now that Alex is leaving, I’m totally back to having no life. And with M+ coming up, i’m really lost because I don’t want to bail on everyone on the last minute with the plot, but i’m afraid if I participate in the plot i’m going to be right back to being obesessed again.

The thing is, for as long as I can remember, I’ve had this need to be included. In whatever, and since I grew up with two friends who did nothing but neglect me, I resorted to the internet friends. And now, PP Has grown to be an obesession, even when now I have awesome friends. PP Makes me feel included, but since Alex is here i’ve been included elsewhere…elsewhere that isn’t screaming about magic and faries and candy and ponies and unicorns and robots and gnomes and Rainbow Jumper. I love my friends to death, but I really can’t go with the whole random thing to much anymore.

Elsewhere, being hanging out with Alex, Kev, and Molly. The other night we all went to the drive-ins, and had lots of fun. It was Alex’s first drive in, like…ever, so we skipped out on the regular movies and went there. We saw Hancock, and Don’t Mess With The Zohan. Hancock was a really cool movie, but Zohan was…awful. Stupidest plot ever. Actually, no plot whatsoever. Plus, bugs were everywhere . My legs are filled with bugbites, and I was wearing jeans. I actually put my sweatshirt on just so my arms didn’t get bitten.

Hancock was awesome. Kinda predictable, not for me, but everyone else totally figured it out. But i’m not very smart, so…hahahaha…I was surprised where everyone else was like “TOTALLY CALLED IT!”

The drive ins were virtually empty, which was amazing. We got this amazing spot up front, and … it ruled. And we bought twizzlers, and snow caps.

In other semi-interesting news, kev accidently hit me on the head with a tree branch…We were walking in the woods, and found this spot. And kev started clearing it, shaking a dead tree. I guess I had it coming, because I had said, “Ya know you can’t actually…pick up the tree…” and four seconds later, he goes, “Watch out!” and I go, “Wha-” *cue tree branch falling* “Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww” *insert laughter*

But karma totally got Kev back today, when he fell out of the shower. Basically, his description of the event was:

“So I was thinking about how to get dad to agree to the whole east coast tour thing, and i went to lean on the wall, but somehow…I got turned around. And then, where I leaned wasn’t the wall…It’s okay though, I landed on my face on the toilet, which broke my fall”

Me, Alex, and my mom were in the living room watching TV, and we hear “BOOM” and mom goes, “What was that!? KEVIN!?” and runs out, and me and alex were like, “…What happened?” -concerned but finding it sooooooooooo not worth it to put in the effort of standing up. My mom comes back in hysterics, and told us the story, etc etc.

I got to see my dearest cousin james today! Er yesterday..its now 2:10AM. But it was awesome. We played rock band, and guitar hero, and talked and stuff. Hes spending the night here tomorrow, and then we’re hanging out on friday at our other cousins house. Plus a wedding reception on Saturday, where I get to wear my new hat![My grandma brought me to a dentist appointment, then we had to go to Target, where I figured i'd entertain myself by trying on hats. Well, she saw it, and said, "OHMYGOSH That looks sooooooo cute on you! Do you want me to buy it?" and I always love hats. So I was like "Reallly?" and shes like "Sure! You better wear it though!" So i'm wearing it saturday. I'll put up pictures XD]

 

Well, i’m offically out of thoughts for now. :]

4th of July!

Is there a fourth of July in England? Of course there is, they just don’t celebrate it.

After a longish night of some amazing Chicago and The Doobie Brothers, plus this guy named Niko from Italy, i’d  gone to bed at 5:30 AM. Sleep has recently becomeing more like a nap, which is why I Should go to bed soon. And so that the statement in the beggining of this paragraph makes sense to those who don’t know, on July 3rd, I went to a Chicago and The Doobie Brothers concert! It was absolutely amazing, the lights were mad awesome, and when you left your ears weren’t ringing because the sound level was perfect. I want to go back on August 4th to see Journey! I probably am going to, too.

So, after all of that, today was the 4th of July. Which means? Totally rockin amazing parties, amazing fireworks, and family renunions. First on the list? Family renunion.

It started at noon, but we didn’t get there until about 1:30. We were pretty late on the whole ‘getting ready’ thing. Which totally wasn’t a surprise, beacuse we always are. When we arrived, there weren’t a ton of people there. But there were enough to make it a fun party, and it was my dads side of the family, who are mostly quite good drinkers anyways…

I loved it, because I got to see my cousin Alex from Georgia, and chill with the cousins who live here but we never see. So, basically it was Me, Alex, Annie, Jenna, Patrick, and Molly.oh my dear brother Kevin brought his girlfriend, Molly.] It started out kinda slow, me and alex and annie and jenna swam for a little while. But it was more of a chill in the pool and talk. And we ate, and hung out, and all the party stuff…After a bit, we all went down in the basement. Kevin and Patrick played guitars together, and Annie was upstairs. And Alex, Jenna, Me and Molly played the most thought-involved card game ever called Pig. It wasn’t poker, which was weird for me. To be playing a card game that didn’t involve poker.

This game was so intense, that everyone got their own deck of cards. The point was to lay out 13 cards beside you, and get rid of them most quickly. But you didn’t take turns, everyone played at once. 4 cards were layed out in front of you, in a row. To get rid of the 13, you could play the cards as solitare with the 4 cards in front of you, or, every two that anyone found was to be put in to the middle, and you build off of the two. To put a card down, it had to be the next consecutive number and the same suit. Oh, and when taking cards from the 13 cards beside you, you could only take from the ends of the row. Whoever lost them first said, “PIG!” and it was a point system from their. Whoever said pig automatically got 10 extra points, and then for the other players every card they had left from the 13 was -2 points. Then, you divided up the cards in the middle from the twos, and each card that was from your deck was +1 point for you.

It took a bit of explaining, and a bit of practice, but finally we all figured it out and played for hours. Unfortunatly, the hardwood floor of the basement wasn’t the most comfortable, so after a few games we moved to the other room with a table in it. But the only table in the basement was unbeliveably low, and the only chairs we could find were unbeliveably high. It wasn’t very comfortable. The game was so intense, though.

The day went on from there, when we finally decided that sitting in really high seats, with a tiny seat wasn’t worth it. And when our minds were sore from all the thinking. So we went upstairs, and had some dessert, and played volleyball.

The first game: Me, Jenna, Molly, Alex VS. Kevin, Patrick and this kid that we didn’t know the name of, so we [Me&Jenna] named him Clint.

Our team failed miserably, mostly because Me and Jenna can’t play for shit, and we didn’t get Molly on our team till halfway through when they saw that we were failing so badly.

And the second game, we did alright. We lost, 25 to 27. Games only went to 25, but you had to win by two and we kept tieing…Although the second game was me, molly, alex, clint vs. kevin, patrick, jenna.

And we played some badmitten. Me and Molly against Kevin and Alex. We lost horribly. We were at 2 to 8, and managed to get our score to 9 before they scored the winning point at 15.

And when we left, it was 9:30PM. And when we got to Jareds, our neighbors 4th of July party, it was 10:00. The band was playing, we arrived and the first thing I heard was, “Apple bottomed jeans…boots with the fur…” etc etc…

They were a great band, played tons of cover songs like that. The lead singer was really cool, her outfit was amazing. But i’m to tried to describe it, but it ruled.

They played for like two hours before leaving, and then we stood around and talked.  This 73yr old offered me a beer. and i was like “i’m 13…” and then he goes over to my dad and he didn’t know that he was my dad, and he goes “See that girl over there?” and my dad goes “Yes…you mean my daughter?” and he goes “oh…shes your daughter. Shes real cute…did you know that shes 13?” That was realllllly weird, and kinda funny XD

We stayed at Jareds party till 1, chatting with neighbors, etc etc. Molly and Kevin spent the whole time together, it was cute :] [Especially when the same old guy was ready to start hitting on Molly...]

Molly actually ended up driving us home, which was pretty funny because my mom was so drunk. Walking to the car from the party,

Mom: WOAH!
Me: What?
Mom: I walked funny…*Giggles*
Me: Mom, you’re drunk.
Mom: Yup!

&& Walking in to the house, it was all dark because we didn’t have the garage light on, and;

Me/Kev/Molly: *Walking in*
Mom: *Behind us* thats a gasgrill..
Me/Kev/Molly: *Die laughing*

Honestly, the worst part of today was when I was ready to go inside at the family party, because I had to get my phone/glasses, and I ran in to the screen…my face is really sore from that lmao

It hurt my pride more than anything, because everyone who was still there was gathered around the porch and saw it. But, I handeled it really well by laughing a lot, mostly fake laughing, hiding my tears from my wounded ego and face, and lieing that I was perfectly fine.

So all in all, a good day like this makes for a ton of fun memories, a lot of happy people, and a fuckin boring blog entry….Honestly if you’re still reading, I take that as a honor, because this blog entry is so boring…Haha whatever, it doesn’t matter to me, I just wanted to write about it :]

 

Well, it is now 2:43 AM and I think i’m headed to sleep XD

No name of it yet….

I suppose this is the beggining of chapter one? I was bored one night and started writing a story…And I don’t care that normally ‘Hanna” is spelled with an ‘H’ at the end. Tis my story, and my name :] Sorry that the story totally sucks! Please give suggestions on how to make it…not suck?

 

Hanna was awake for a bit before she opened her large eyes. And once again, she was woken to the sound of fighting below her. After blinking a few times to clear her vision, she looked at the digital clock in her room. The small red lights in it spelled out the time as being 5:14AM. ‘So,’ Hanna thought, ‘Their fights are getting earlier and earlier in the morning. Or, perhaps they were up all night.’

Hanna really didn’t know, and Hanna really didn’t care. All she cared about was when the divorce of her parents would be, and who she would be going with. She didn’t mind that her thoughts could be described as cold, or heartless. They’d been fighting for the past 12 months of her 14 year long life, and she was really growing sick of hearing their raised voices, and the occasional crash of something else thrown in a fit of rage. Unlike most girls her age, Hanna didn’t allow herself the deluded fantasy that her parents would work through whatever they were going through. That they’d remember why they fell in love in the first place, and pure romance would take the place of whatever problems they were having. Honestly, that lovey dovey shit only happened in the movies, and Hanna knew it.

Despite her pure exhaustion, Hanna found the strenght to stand up. She knew she’d never be able to fall asleep again anyways, she never could after she was woken up. She rolled out of bed, and walked to the mirror. Sometimes, she liked to look at her reflection. Narcissism played a very small roll in her personality.

She looked at her hair, thin, layered, short and red. And she looked at the features of her face, her slightly long nose and hazel eyes. She admired her-

“I AM NOT PICKING UP THE RADIO!” a loud crash from below, and the voice shreiking with rage that she knew as her mothers was all it took to break her train of thoughts. ‘Okay,’ she decided, ‘Time to get out of the house.’

She was very familiar of getting out of the house without going downstairs. She did it very often. And, after throwing a large yellow t-shirt over her cami that she wore to sleep, she would do it again.

Opening the window, she climbed on to the roof. The roof was steepest here, so she very carefully moved while on it. Sitting on the roof, she managed to move very far left, where she grabbed hold of a tree branch. And, after carefully climbing down the tree, she was free from her house. She was in the crisp morning air of the summer month of August, and free to roam her neighborhood.

She chose to go to her best friends house, Mark. His house always had a positive feel to it. His family was so laid back, they were basically awesome. His parents were far from strict, and he’d been Hanna’s best friend forever since gradeschool. He’d been an only child, like Hanna, and the two protected eachother from drama since kindergarten. (The drama in kindergarten of someone stealing your markers was quite horrifying.)

They always stayed quiet while the one would rant, and had the most fun together when they were both in a good mood. Thier countless inside jokes proved this fact. If Hanna said something that made absolutely no sense at all, Mark would understand perfectly what she was talking about. The two were indeed wonderful friends.

However, on this day, as Hanna arrived at Marks house, she realized that no one was home. Her first clue to this was when she saw didn’t see the normal winter green Nissan Sentra in the driveway. And when she found that the door was locked, she’d connected the two clues in her mind, and in much disappointment, walked away.

Luckily, she had a back up house that she could go to. Her other best friend, Lelias house. Lelia was a wonderful person, and although Lelia and Hanna weren’t as close as Hanna and Mark, the two were still wonderful friends. They had met in fifth grade, when Lelia moved to this communtity.  But, it wasn’t until reaching the front porch of Lelia’s house did Hanna remember that, much to Lelia’s dismay, her family had taken a vacation to go Alaska to go skiing.

So, for once in her life, Hanna was truely alone. Her friends, her wonderful friends, her entire support system through her entire life, were both currently away from their neighborhood. Hanna didn’t care that maybe if she had more than two friends, she might have somewhere to go. The only having two friends had worked for a long time, she wasn’t about to change that. Enough was already changing.

Perhaps she was simply feeling more sorry for herself than she should’ve been, but she was feeling insanely sad as she walked slowly back to her own house. Sounds of fighting could be heard from the outside, and, not bothering to reclimb the tree and return to her room through the same window that she’d exited it, she opened the door and tried to quietly climb the stairs. Unfortunatly, she’d forgotten that the stairs were creaky, and she was called in to the living room with her parents.

The anger in the living room could be felt when someone walked in. Both her parents were frowning, and her father quickly asked, “Where have you been?”

Hanna glared at her parents for a moment, before responding with, “I was out in the communtity.”

It was Hanna’s mothers turn to ask a question. “How did you get out there? We didn’t hear you…”

“I walked through the door.” Hanna lied simply. And, much to her surprise, her parents didn’t say anything more on the matter.

Instead, they took turns informing Hanna that they would be getting a divorce. Hannas father would be leaving town, moving from the state of New Jersey to the state of California. Hanna’s mother would be staying here, in New Jersey. And it was up to Hanna to decide who she’d live with.

Pausing for a moment, Hanna didn’t answer right away. She knew her answer, she’d stay with her mom. She decided this a few months ago, when the idea of divorce had first entered her head. The descision was easy, she’d be staying with her mom because her mom was staying here. If her dad was staying here, then she’d be staying with her dad.

But her dad was moving. To California. This was the thought that surprised Hanna the most. California!? Why couldn’t he just move to another county, rather than another state? Or perhaps a different city. Hanna was expecting that after the divorce, she’d still get to see both of her parents.

However, she didn’t let this affect her descision. And, after a few moments, she very quietly answered. “Here,” She said. “I’m staying here…with mom.”

Her parents nodded in unison, and both walked away to seperate rooms, leaving Hanna there to think even more about what the hell just happened.

Thoughts at…morning

Well, this blog entry is started at 3:52 AM. I don’t know what it’s about, or when i’ll finish writing it. I know that I really should go to sleep, but I so don’t want to. And I know that music is the only thing keeping me company right now, because everyone signed offline. I also know that “I Am The Walrus” by The Beatles is a fuckin weird song.

Usually, these blog posts are the ones with the deep insightful thoughts about life. But right now, I don’t have any deep insightful thoughts about life. The music is now Miss Delany by Jacks Mannequin. I don’t always love sharing my thoughts on life. And i’m certainly not very good at the whole deep thinking thing. Not as good as Abi, or Mere, or Blu. Or anyone.

I’m really not good at a lot of things. Well, rephrase. I fail miserably at life. But thats okay. I don’t care that i’m talentless, because I have the things that keep me happy. I have my family, and my friends, and my inside jokes, and my favorite tv shows, and my favorite music. I have my fairly good will power, that kept me offline for the 40 days of lent. I also have those little insignificant things that I sometimes focus my attention on.

But if you think about it, everything is insignificant. Most everything, anyways. Any little bit of the drama that puts you through hell. Or stupid fights, and complaining about something retarted to someone. It drives me so crazy when I hear about the stupidest reasons to be mad at someone, but I don’t really want to hurt anyones feelings. Especially the feelings of my friends; I seriously care about them. So I keep my mouth shut, and allow people to continue complaning.

I can understand sensible ranting, about true issues. People have this way of driving themselves in to this closet in their mind, and the closet is plagued with things like anger, and depression, and loss, and any other adjective that is unhappy, that i’m missing. And in this closet, the door is always locked.

Everyone has their own methods of picking the lock on the door. Some choose to vent and rant to people. Some write about it in their diary, or perhaps a blog. Some ignore everything around them in this closet, and choose to sit in a corner of it. Whatever works for ya.

Me? I tend to do all three. Or doing silly tasks, like if your mad at someone, writing their name on a piece of paper and ripping it to shreds. No one gets hurt, and I end up feeling slightly better. I’ve also found that screamo music blasting in your ears so you can’t think, helps too.

And most of that is so insignificant. If you truely think about it, there are so many more problems in the world that our things of drama don’t even pale in comparison to. There is so much hunger around us, and everyone is to caught up in their lives to notice. Which is perfectly okay, I mean, people have some fuckin busy lives. And I’d be a hypocrite if I said that I didn’t have problems that I ususally focused my attention on. But sometimes, I stop and think about that, and I realize how unimportant they are. But then, something breaks my train of thoughts and i’m right back like everybody else. Usually, sleep breaks my train of thoughts. I do most of my thinking before I go to sleep…

It’s 4:24, and i’ve run out of things to say. But i’m going to keep trying, because if ‘I’m talentless’ could turn in to those few tiny paragraphs, then perhaps I can keep going.

I really am talentless. But, and I have no idea how this is connected, I’ve realized ask any you shall recieve is quite a true statement. I realize how insanely shallow that sounds, but what i’m saying is if you ask for something, it’ll eventually come. You just have to be really patient, and it usually isn’t what you were expecting. But, nevertheless, what you ask for does come.

Wow, a ton of people are probably going to disagree with that last paragraph. But i’m just writing about my expirence, and thats what i’ve found.

So, i’ve decided to start blasting screamo music; Alesana. But i’m sure you’re totally interested in that.

Well, now it’s 4:32, and i’m gonna stop writing for now. At least, stop writing about this topic, whatever this topic actually is. Well, whatever it is, it’s grown really really dull….

Mitch Hedberg

Okay, so Mitch Hedberg died in…2005, on a drug overdose. [I'm not judging.]

He is soooo fuckin funny, and tonight while i’m sitting in my extreme boredom, I found some amazing quotes from him, and I felt like sharing.

“In England Smoky the Bear is not the forest fire prevention representative. They have Smacky the Frog. It’s just like a bear, but it’s a frog. I think it’s a better system, I think we should adopt it. Because bears can be mean, but frogs are always cool. Never has there been a frog hopping toward me, and I thought ‘man, I’d better play dead. Here comes that frog…’ You never say here comes that frog in a nervous manner. It’s always optimistic. Hey here comes that frog, al-right. Maybe he’ll come near me so I can pet him, and stick him in a mayonnaise jar, with a stick and a leaf, to recreate what he’s used to. And I’m pretty sure I’d have to punch some holes in the lid, because he’s damn sure used to air. Then I can observe him, and he won’t be doing much in his 16 ounce world.”

“I’m against picketing but I don’t know how to show it.”

“I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shishkabobs.”

 ”I played golf… I did not get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. That’s way more satisfying…”

“I would imagine if you could understand Morse Code, a tap dance would drive you crazy.”

“My apartment is infested with koala bears. It’s the cutest infestation ever. Way better than cockroaches. When I turn on the light, a bunch of koala bears scatter, but I don’t want them too. I’m like, “Hey… Hold on fellows… Let me hold one of you, and feed you a leaf.” Koala are so cute, why do they have to be so far away from me. We need to ship a few over, so I can hold one, and pat it on its head. “

“I type a 101 words a minute. But it’s in my own language.”

Okay, so those were my favorite Mitch Hedberg quotes…RIP, Mitch Hedberg.

First Post!

So…This is the first post in the blog..Woo! I really don’t know what to write, except that it’s the first post. I’ll try to write in my blog as often as possible, with as much as I can think of…

 

For now i’ll just say thank you, Abi, for telling me to make a blog and helping me come up with names for it!

Hello world!

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